Bittersweet Destiny Home

Chapter 17: Lose Control.

After several packing hours, the crew settled in their new living room in front the fire. It was 11 o’clock and they all rested in silence. Everybody held mugs of tea, coffee or herbal tea and watched the fire in deep thought. A light rain hit the windows slowly. Rick looked at Lisa next to him and lost the track of his thoughts, so he just concentrated on the ghostly shadows that the fire played on her skin.

“Hey Rick…Earth to Rick” joked Roy. Rick looked at him slowly.
“What?” said Rick, almost annoyed at being interrupted.
“Nothing…” said Roy. Everybody laughed while Rick sipped his coffee.
“This is so….weird” said Sammie suddenly sounding completely serious. “I feel completely lost. This place is unbelievably beautiful. I feel completely out of place here”.

Kim looked at her and nodded.
“I know what you mean. Everything has happened just too quickly. I didn’t have time to register the changes, and they are big changes…we are used to battles but now we have to defend this land AND create a town with everything…”
“It’s not like we can depend on someone else…” said Vanessa looking to their friends “We are used to having someone else making all the big decisions, but even though we have Lisa here, and I know she is going to be great in this, we all have more responsibilities. It’s like we were all promoted…” but Roy interrupted her.

“…But without the extra pay” he said, smirking, but Vanessa gave him a dirty look “I know what you mean V, but it’s not that bad…I know I’m not an authority on the subject, but the years have taught me some things. We are going to be fine” he said with Vanessa smiling back at him, trying to convince herself.
“I hope you are right” said Miriya worried looking at Dana “I can handle the dislike of humans, but with Dana here, so close…I’m worried that someone might try something against her” she said looking at Lisa.
“As long I am here, Miriya, I will not let anything happen to her” said Lisa firmly and that was exactly what the zentraedi needed to hear.
“Don’t worry” said Rick suddenly “Me too…we are not going to let anything happen to her and to any of us. I’m pretty sure these people are reasonable. Just…trust us” said Rick seriously and looking positive as a leader. Roy smiled to himself.
“We can take turns” said Claudia.
“Turns?” asked Roy looking at his girlfriend worried.
“Yeah Roy, turns. There are 9 of us here, we can take turns taking care of her” she said raising an eyebrow. Immediately the face of the trio shinned.
“That would be great!” said Sammie with joy.
“I don’t want to cause trouble to any of you. Mir and I can handle her” said Max.
“Nonsense!” said Kim firmly and everybody jumped a little “You and Miriya are needed in the base now more than ever. And Dana is a cutie…it’s not problem at all” she said and drink her tea.
“Kim is right, Max” said Lisa and put her head in Rick’s shoulder. He immediately accommodated himself so both of them were comfortable against the couch. “she is adorable, it will not be a problem”

Max nodded but was still unsure, Miriya too.
“Look” said Rick “Let’s split the time, so we all can take care of her and work in the same day”
“How, smart ass?” said Roy smirking…Claudia stepped on his foot in reply. “OUCH!” he said, Rick grinned.
“I mean split the day in two. In five days of work, we all can easily take care of her half of the day, and another one at the afternoon. Just one of us have to repeat one day” he said playing with Lisa’s hair.
“That sound good” said Roy.
“Wouldn’t it be easier if we hire a nanny?” said Max.
“We don’t know anyone here” said Miriya looking at him “I don’t trust leaving her with a stranger yet” she said and Max nodded, looking sad.
“Don’t worry you two” said Roy firmly and everybody look at him, one eyebrow raised.
“What?!” he said looking offended. Everybody smiled a little.
“We just need to make a schedule” said Vanessa and stood to look for a pen and some paper. After a while she returned with the writing tools.
“Ok” she said “who is going to take the first turn tomorrow? I think would be good if Miriya take the one in the morning and Max in the afternoon, so the change would not be so dramatic for Dana”.

Everybody nodded and then they write everything down choosing days and hours. After a while, Vanessa sighed.
“Done, so…Mondays will be Miriya and Max; Tuesdays, Kim and Sammie; Wednesdays Claudia and I; Thurdays, Miriya again and Roy; Fridays, Rick and Lisa” said Vannesa and everybody agreed.

“Ok, now that is settled, I think will be good if we go to sleep” said Claudia standing up. Roy fallowed her closely.

“Yeah…better for us to go to sleep, there’s a lot of work” said Lisa standing up. Roy smirked and she raised an eyebrow.
“Any problems Fokker?” she asked.
“No, no…Nothing!” he said looking innocent.
“C’mon” said Rick holding Lisa’s hand “lets go”. Roy smirked again, unnoticed.

Everyone walked to their respective bedrooms on the second and third floors of the chalet, but before Rick and Lisa went into their bedroom, Roy hollered aloud.

“Ok, you two don’t be too loud! There’s a baby in the house” and then grabbing Claudia’s hand, he and Claudia disappeared in their bedroom before Lisa could answer. Lisa frowned but entered their bedroom, but suddenly she smirked. Rick looked at her and gulped.
“What?” he asked curiously. He never thought his wife was so tricky.
“Nothing…but just for that…I am going to fly HIS VF tomorrow” she answered and kissed his cheek before walking to the bedroom. Rick smiled slowly and walked to their bed.


The morning started really early for the still-unknown base’s new crew. A lot of sleepy faces were around at 6 AM, until Lisa came strangely smiling come into the kitchen.

“And why are you that happy?” asked Roy holding his face with one hand, looking cranky.
“Ohh…we aren’t a morning person Mr. Fokker?” asked Lisa smirking and grabbing a cup of coffee. Everybody else was still too sleepy to notice anything. Vannesa was yawning in one corner of the big table and Kim and Sammie were sleeping in their chairs near the fire, to keep them warm. It was a dark raining morning with some wind.
“I don’t want to ask why you are so happy. If Rick came smiling as much as you, I will be sick…” he said faking a disgusted face and rolling his eyes. Lisa laughed for herself slowly and Roy noticed.
“YOU DID IT!?” said Roy again with an accusatory face, Lisa looked innocent to him. “Eww! That’s disgusting and a dirty trick Hayes!” complained the senior pilot.
“And why is it a dirty trick?” she asked sitting next to Vanessa who passed her the sugar, with another yawn.
“BECAUSE we are supposed to be mad with you, remember? Making us work as a bridge bunnies for 2 weeks…” he said but stop as the girls jumped fully alert.
“Damn!” said Kim worried “I totally forgot! Now we have to be their two nannies!” said rubbing her eyes. Roy’s eyes grow wider.
“Oh My God…Yeah Lisa, this isn’t fair! If you want to punish them, then why we should pay too?” said Sammie frowning. Roy looked indignant, but nobody noticed him.
“Sorry girls…But look on the bright side. You can boss them as much as you want” said Lisa smiling to them. Vanessa and Sammie smiled widely but Kim frowned even more.
“And what makes you believe that they are going to obey us?” she asked suspiciously and Lisa looked slowly at Roy, who was smiling devilishly.
“Because…I have full authority here. And if Roy don’t want to cooperate here, I can always send him back to Macross City…ALONE….FOR A YEAR….without ANYBODY he knows…it’s his choice”, ended Lisa and she finished her morning coffee. Roy was speechless for a while, and his only answered was a groan, a frown and hiding his face behind his mug of coffee. The trio laughed aloud.
“But what about Rick?” asked Vanessa.
“Don’t worry about Hunter. We have an ‘agreement’” said Lisa smiling to herself. Roy’s eyes grow even wider.
“Is not fair! You can’t suborn my wingmate with sex!” he said pointing a finger. Lisa didn’t get upset at all, she just raised an eyebrow and smirked dangerously.
“Well…maybe you can give him a better offer then?” she said slowly and put her mug of coffee down in the table. After a second, Roy made a disgusted face.
“EWW! No….I lost there” he said finally, loosing.

“GOOD MORNING EVERYONE!” said a cheerfully Rick walking to the kitchen, but his only answer was the huge laugh of The Trio, a smirking Lisa and even Roy’s very disgusted face.

On their way to the base, the sky cleared a little and Roy murmured under his breath even more. He was really pissed off, especially after Lisa told him that she was going to use his VF. Claudia took his hand on hers and smiled sweetly at him but Roy just looked at her suspiciously and murmured “traitor” to her. Claudia couldn’t stop laughing aloud.

After they arrived at the base, they quickly set everything and the girls started checking the equipment of the tower. Lisa and Claudia stayed there for a while, checking her own panels. Both Rick and Roy looked absolutely dumb full about what to do in there. Sammie looked at them from the corner of her eyes and sighed.

“Ok you two…come here” said Sammie in a very professional voice and both Rick and Roy walked next to her in a second. Vanessa softly smiled from her place.

“Ok, you are going to take Claudia place as the chief Communications Officer, SO… Kim is officially your assistant BUT, of course, you will have to obey her because you don’t have a clue what you have to do” sighed Sammie. Roy looked at Kim and she smiled showing her teeth. Roy gulped.

“And you Rick, you will take Lisa’s usual job in the SDF-1 and I am your assistant” she said smiling devilishly. This time, Rick gulped.
“What about Vanessa?” he asked .
“V is the Chief Computer Operator, Rick. She can handle herself alone…sorry” she said smiling like a fool again. Rick desperately looked towards Lisa’s direction but she was holding her laugh as much as she could while checking her board. Finally, Rick nodded, accepting his fate.

“All Right!” said Lisa and Claudia agreed. They turned around with a smiled in her face and look to everyone, ready to go.

“We settled everything here. You shouldn’t have problems as long as you follow the trio’s instructions” said Lisa. Rick nodded, Roy frown.

“Ok…so…I think we are ready to go, right Lisa?” said Claudia looking a little nervous. Roy looked at her from the corner of his eyes.
“Yeah, we are ready” said Lisa smiling, completely secure. Rick looked at her and felt proud of his stubborn wife, he smiled a little, but not enough for her to notice.

As Lisa and Claudia walked away, Lisa looked back to Rick one more time who winked at her. She smiled widely. Claudia was looking a little nervous but walked with her outside. After they left, Roy passed nervously around looking through the door.

“Damn it!” he cursed and ran outside the bridge. Everybody looked at him wondering.

Lisa and Claudia were almost outside when Roy finally reached them, breathing hard from the run.
“Wait!” said Roy “Lisa…can I talk with Claudia for a second?” he said and Lisa smartly, leave the two of them alone. Claudia looked to Roy wondering but he smirked, trying to catch his breath.

“What is it?” she said looking at him.
“Look, forget what I said. I’m a jerk…I know, but if you don’t feel ready to fly, then say it…I promise I will not say anything about it” he said seriously. Claudia looked at him and smiled slowly, feeling a 100 times better.
“You are worried for me?” she asked.
“Of course woman! What do you think? I am such a lousy boyfriend?” he said looking hurt, genuine this time. Claudia smiled even more.
“You are a great boyfriend Roy. I love you” she said and stepping closer, she gave him a sweet kiss. After they barely finished the kiss, Roy looked at her in her eyes and sighed.
“Ok…I guess you are flying anyway…” he said and Claudia nodded affirmative “Well, then just remember to keep your hands inside and everything will be fine” he said, winking at her. Claudia laughed softly.
“I will be fine. It been a while for me since the simulators, but don’t worry…” she said and Roy kissed her passionately.
“For the road” he said after they broke the kiss again winking to her before returning to the bridge. Claudia smiled and turned around and walked to ‘her’ VF.


Lisa jumped into the Skull leader’s VF excited. Claudia was already in Rick’s VF and ready to follow instructions.

“This is so great” said Lisa to Claudia and her friend smiled nervously.
“I didn’t know you were a flying freak too” said Claudia from her com channel.
“I’m not!” said Lisa almost ashamed “It’s’s been a while and I always thought this was exciting. I have other talents…but this sound like fun” said Lisa truthfully and ready to take off.
“We imagined your ‘other’ talents Hayes,” said the sarcastic voice of Roy from the bridge.
“Hey! Shut up!” said Rick, who came onto the screen too. Lisa looked wondering if she looked so weird in the little screen as well.
“How are you two there?” asked Claudia also entertained with the little show.
“Lousy. Kim is really bossy” complained Roy as Kim shouted a “Hey!” from her place.
“Well, now you two will know what ‘the terrible trio’ actually means” said Lisa.
“This is a punishment…really” complained Roy and this time Kim smacked the back of his head. “Hey! You’ve been around Claudia too much”.

Rick just listened to Sammie, looking completely lost on what to do next.
“Err…ok…I think you can take off?” he said and looking from Lisa to Sammie. The latter was sighing aloud.
“Oh yeah…sorry…yes, you have permission to take off” repeated Rick, who was starting to sweat.
“Roger that bridge but...where are we going?” asked Lisa pushing her husband into an even more nervous state. Rick looked at her but then realized that all of the report papers had landed on the floor. Claudia and Lisa smiled, much enjoying the scene while Roy helped Rick picking up the papers. After a while, both of them came back onto the screen.

“Err… let me see…which one Sammie?” asked Rick looking behind him again and Sammie told him again.
“Oh yeah…sector A-10 to C-16 in a recognition flight” said Rick finally.
“Roger that” said Lisa and was ready to take off.
“So?” asked Claudia, following Lisa’s game.
“So what?” asked Rick, looking lost again and very pale.
“So?...can we take off?” asked Claudia again.
“Oh…yeah YES, you can take off…now” said Rick almost copying what Lisa used to say.

Both women laughed and then took off. The experience was absolutely enchanting for both of them, especially because they were the ones controlling the planes. Claudia felt more relaxed once she was in the air while Lisa felt her adrenaline go up and up every second. They spent most of the time flying around as everybody was working taking the new data from the air. Rick and Roy were absolutely lost with the commands being used around them, while Kim was dealing with a sudden headache from fighting with Roy.

Lisa looked down to the territory and saw all the green down there. It was a beautiful place, even if the day wasn’t very clear. The rivers, mountains and forest were wild once again, and the ocean was visible from far away. She felt a strange sensation in her. She moved the VF a little to the right and realized how softly it responded to her movements. Claudia was just flying straight and following instructions, but Lisa suddenly felt the necessity to do something else…to test the VF in her hands.

“Lisa? You are breaking formation, return to your position” said Rick looking at the screen.
Lisa looked at Rick in the screen and frowned. This wasn’t funny at all.
“Lisa? Is everything ok there?” asked Rick when she didn’t return to her position.
“Nope, everything is fine” she said innocently. Rick knew that face.
“Lisa…what are you doing?” he asked raising an eyebrow.
“Nothing, really! It’s just…this veritech is really easy to fly…I was wondering what I can do with it.” she said, looking to the ground again.
“Er…you can do a lot, but remember you are not trained” said Rick seriously.
“I know! I know…but…ok…let me try something, ok? Claudia stay there” she said and just then, she flew her plane to open sky, up in the stratosphere.

Everybody in the bridge froze. The Trio looked to their screens and Roy was pale.
“Lisa! Stop!” said Roy worried about his VF.
Lisa just laughed and accelerated, pushing the VF high in the sky.
“Lisa!! Stop that!” said Rick getting scared, but all he could do was listen to Lisa’s laugh who then changed direction and rocketed her plane with high speed, crossing the sky over Claudia’s craft.
“Lisa stop it!” said Claudia from her position “You are acting weird!”.
“Sorry…but this is just way too fun, Claudia! Look!” she said and then she turned around and changed to Guardian Mode at high speed.
“LISA!! You’re going to destroy my VF” said Roy almost fainting. Lisa laughed even more.

Kim and Vanessa looked at each other worried.

Lisa made an amazing turn in the sky in guardian mode, stopped and then smirked “I always wanted to do this” she said and Rick froze.
“Lisa, stop it!! It’s….it’s an order!” said Rick, too freaked out by her behavior. Lisa looked at him in the screen, upset. How could he demand something like that? She never had any kind of fun, and now she was just testing the ship. It wasn’t like she didnn’t know what she was doing, she thought.
“Oh C’mon Rick…I’m just testing this thing!” she complained.
Rick looked seriously at a her “You don’t have the necessary training to do that. You can hurt yourself or damage the navigation command of the ship” he said firmly.
“I’m not stupid you know? I know what I can do and what I can’t. and I did this before, so don’t tell me what to do!” she said annoyed.
Rick was furious. He hit the panel control and felt completely impotent of doing nothing.
“Just drop it Lisa! You are making a fool of yourself” he said but regretted it as soon as he saw her face. She was livid.
“Am I making a fool of myself? AM I?? I been doing my job all these years and NOW you tell ME what to do like I am some kind of stupid idiot?? You can do all the bullshit you want, but I can’t? I don’t think that’s fair!” she shouted. everybody kept quiet.

Rick looked at her severely in the screen.
“Skull 1…come back to base….NOW” he said in a dangerous tone.

Lisa was overexcited about flying and she didn’t want to leave it so soon. The sky was her limit, and she felt overjoyed with the freedom, because it was like she was flying without a machine under her. She looked at Rick at the screen and smirked.

“Forget it” she said simply and changed to Fighter Mode and fly up to the sky. Everybody gasped on the bridge. Claudia changed to Guardian and stayed in her place scared. Roy was speechless and Rick was screaming to Lisa but she didn’t listen to single a thing. She was in an emotional and dangerously overexcited stated and all she felt was her blond running and her heart pumping fast. She liked it.

Lisa flew over the clouds and beyond. Reaching the limit, she stop and left the VF hanging in the sky. After a second, she changed her direction down, and felt free fall for some distance, before she needed more and accelerated dangerously.
“STOP IT, STOP IT!!” screamed Claudia watching the scene.
But Lisa didn’t listen, she just saw how the clouds passed her and then she saw the land before her. She laughed widely.
“LISAAA YOU ARE GOING TO KILL YOUSELF! STOP IT STOP IT” screamed Rick shaking from the effort.
“You are going to see what kind of pilot I can be…” she murmured and Rick’s eyes grow wider more scared than anything he felt in his life.
“LISAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” screamed Rick desperately.

Lisa felt the great speed and just in the exact moment, she cut the velocity fast enough to change again to guardian mode, just in time to fly over the trees of the forest and take off again.

Lisa laughed hysterical in the screen and everybody in the bridge kept silent. Rick was in his knees in the floor. Roy was shaking while Vanessa, Kim and Sammie stared with their mouth opened.

“I can’t believe she did it” said Vanessa over an over again.
Kim sat in her seat and hid her face in her hands, breathing hard. Sammie was the first yo react and grabbed Rick’s communicator.

“Lisa, Claudia, came back immediately to the bridge, RIGHT NOW, Claudia…you lead now” said Sammie.

Claudia answered affirmative and change coursed back to the base, Lisa following behind.

“I never thought Lisa would do something like that! She is amazing!” said Kim still pale.
“Amazing?! AMAZING?! SHE ALMOST KILLED HERSELF!” shouted Rick trying to stand up. “what the hell did she think she was doing!!” he said and the trio looked at him.
“Rick, it’s very normal for first time pilots to do that, we handle them all the time…it’s an adrenaline shock…” explained Vanessa.
“I DON’T FUCKING CARE WHAT WAS IT! SHE ALMOST KILLED HERSELF!” said Rick too nervous and afraid.

Vanessa walked next to him and helped him stand up. “Look, it’s quite normal. We handle this all the time. We never thought Lisa would have this…not all the pilots have it, but it is kind of usual for new ones, especially during their first training flights” she said again but Rick didn’t listen. He felt completely furious towards Lisa. How she did something so stupid!, he thought. Rick thought in the possible consequences and shacked his head. There was only one thought in his head, and that was to see Lisa, and shake her until some sense entered her brain.

After ten minutes, both VFs returned save to the base. As soon as she landed, Rick turned around and run angrily towards her, Roy following closely.

Lisa jumped from the VFs still too excited to notice what she did. She smiled widely and ran to Claudia, talking about what she did. Claudia looked at her and said nothing, knowing perfectly what she had. They both walked back to base when Rick came into the view running and looking extremely angry toward Lisa.

“What the fuck did you think you were doing?!” said Rick holding Lisa from the shoulders. Lisa step back and free herself from him.
“HEY! Stop it!” she said angry
“Stop it? STOP IT?? WHY should I stop it if when I beg you to stop that nonsense and you didn’t?” asked Rick stepping closer and looking dangerously. Lisa stepped back for reaction.
“WHAT?! I WAST JUST FLYING! Don’t be so dramatic” she said and walked again. Rick hold her from her arms and turned her around.
“Flying? You called THAT flying? That was the most stupid thing I ever saw in my life!!” he said and hold her elbow painfully.
“Stop that! You are hurting me!” she complained.
“GOOD! Because you fucking scared me out there!! You almost killed yourself and you didn’t realize it!!! YOU…YOU…” he said trying to find the words.
“ME WHAT? Just one freaking time I don’t fallowed orders and you scream like a baby!! YOU do that all the time! You scared the shit out of me every freaking day and just because I did it once you make such a big deal?” she said and finally free herself from him.

Roy hugged Claudia and left them fighting alone. Both of them need time to work this out.

“You did this in purpose??” asked Rick raising an eyebrow indignant “You did this to revenge of me for all those times?!”
“Don’t flattered yourself that much, Hunter” said Lisa stepping back “ It just…happened! I didn’t plan it! I just feel it and did it! What?! I can’t do what I want now, you are the only one who can do that?!” she said and started shaking a little.
“Well…it is kind of ‘dangerous’ when you act impulsive Lisa! You shouldn’t do it! First you sleep with the first psycho that came close to you and now you almost kill yourself out there!” he shouted at her but regretted his words as soon as they come out. Lisa slapped him hard in the face.
“How could you!! HOW COULD YOU!” said Lisa, eyes full with tears and looking angry. Rick touched his sore cheek and looked at her. She was shaking furiously for her emotional state.
“Lisa…I’m sorry...I shouldn’t have…” he said but she interrupted him.
“You shouldn’t have said that, but you did it anyway…that is what you think of me, right? That I am some kind of stupid girl who needs to be rescued by you. FORGET IT! I DON’T NEED YOU! I DON’T NEED ANYBODY!” she said and run away inside the base.

Rick stood there looking how she ran away from him, feeling miserable. He felt sorrow, pain but mostly, he was scared. Scared of what she was capable of doing, scared because he almost lost her and he wasn’t prepared for that. He never would be, and the pain of just thinking about it, was more than he was capable of taking.


Rick walked back to the bridge and the silence was in the room. Nobody looked at him, trying to give him some privacy. It was obviously that they saw from distance the fight and even though they didn’t hear it, they saw when Lisa slapped him and that was enough for them to step back about this.

It was the noon when Miriya changed places with Max at lunchtime, the Trio told her everything that happened. Miriya bit her lower lip worried then looked towards Rick’s direction. He was sitting in another table, playing with his food. Lisa was nowhere to be seen.

Roy and Claudia walked looking a little worried to the cafeteria. There weren’t more than 30 people on the whole base, and nobody expected them to know about Lisa’s little air show, and that was a good thing. Claudia looked at Rick and sighed. They walked next to him.

“Can we join you?” asked Claudia politely. Rick looked at her and nodded, his face showing how bad he felt.
“You did well today, both of you” said Claudia trying to make conversation.
“Yeah…I have to admit that it is a hundred times more difficult than I thought” said Roy truthfully and looking at Rick with the corner of the eye. He was in a silent trance, looking at the window.
“I told you” said Claudia.

They spent some time in silence and Claudia made a gesture with her head to Roy to talk. She stood up and went for some food.

“Hmm…Hey, how do you feel?” asked Roy not knowing exactly what to do.
“Like crap” answered Rick, not looking at him.
“Well…don’t think about it that much. She is fine, that is what matters” said Roy patting his back. Rick sighed even more and looked down to his now cold lunch.
“I blew it Roy. I couldn’t think! I just…I was so scared about what she did! I never felt so…so…” he said but couldn’t find the words.
“Helpless” said Roy.
“Exactly. helpless. I wanted to make her stop but I couldn’t! she laughed and laughed and it was awful! She was completely out of control and I couldn’t do anything about it” he said desperately.
“That is why she is in charge of that position, Rick. Until today I never realized what exactly the girls were doing, and I have to say that now I feel a lot more respect for their job. Claudia told me that Lisa is the one who managed that crisis all the times in practices. I knew about it, It never happened to me, but I knew about it…I just never thought about it before” explained Roy and Rick finally looked at him.
“You mean Lisa is the one who controls that behavior?” asked Rick.
“Yes, and she is the only one who can control those pilots. She has some nerve, and we have to admit, she is damn good pilot…” said Roy smiling a little but Rick raised an annoyed eyebrow “I know I know…she made a mistake, but she has talent, you have to admit it. Anyway…Lisa is the one who controls those adrenalin shocks some pilots get. Claudia said that she always lectures pilots about it, and that is why everybody fears her so much. But she is like THE only one who can control them from the bridge” finalized Roy.
Rick keep silence for a while and remember when he took the VFs years ago for the first time it Lisa was the one who helped him control the machine and turned it into Battloid mode. Rick remembered how she managed to have authority even when she was just a little picture in the screen, now he felt even worse.

“Roy…I said something terrible to her…” started Rick but Roy stopped him.
“I know. We talked with her before we came here. She told us” said Roy and Rick felt he was becoming smaller in his seat.
“You two where out of control and you two did or said what you couldn’t manage. Lisa is in her office feeling completely guilty about what she did. She feels ashamed and silly. You know her…that’s how she reacts. I am worried about her” said Roy.
“Worried why?” asked Rick.
“Because you know her…how much she pushes herself. I don’t think she will move on past this easily, if ever. Nobody is going to punish her as much as herself, and I am worried about that” explained Roy and Claudia come back to the table with the food.

“Here, this one is warm” said Claudia and passing a new plate of food to Rick. he thanked her and tried to eat something.
“I don’t think she will forgive me for what I said” said Rick suddenly. Claudia and Roy looked at each other.
“She will, eventually” answered Claudia taking a sip of her juice “But I think maybe you two need to talk. But not here….give her some space, some time…” said Claudia wisely. Rick looked at her and nodded.

That afternoon, Lisa called everyone in the bridge for a meeting. Everybody was there, looking at her in silence and still a little shocked. Lisa felt awful inside, but she covered that with her old self, professional look and seriousness. The only sign of her stated was her almost ghostly pale face. Rick looked at her, still ashamed, and kicked himself, because he put even more salt in her wound.

“I called this meeting for the instructions of this afternoon” she began trying to control the trembling in her voice “First, I want to apologize for my behavior of this morning. It was completely inappropriate and out of control for an RDF officer. I apologize to everyone for it. I will never happen again, and I will informed myself in two more weeks about the incident” she said and everybody looked at each other. Roy crossed his arms around his chest. He knew she was going to do something like that, to punished herself even more.

“Second. This afternoon we are going to secure the perimeter area of our base for internal communication. For that reason, a group of ten people, and myself, are going to walk around in sub areas, inserting a digital advice in the ground every 20 feet. This will let us have full communication control, considering all the infantry activity we will have in the future. Each group will have 2 partners, one in charge of installation of the advice and the other to help and with security. I remind you that this area is wild, full with animals and predators. Each time a group inserts one of these devices in the ground, a signal will be registered here. One veritech will surround the area if any problem comes along. Lt. Parino will be on charge of this activity” said Lisa finally and everybody keep deathly silence.
“Why do you have to go out there?” asked Rick suddenly. Lisa looked at him for a second, but was not capable to look in his eyes. She looked away before answered.
“I participated in the design of the device with Doctor Lang years ago. I think I can help if any group has a problem with it.” she said finally. Rick bit his lip.
“Well, most of you will stay here. Lt. Parino will take Captain Fokker place here and monitored the activity, and Captain, you will be fly again” said Lisa with apologetic eyes to him. Roy sighed sadly. “You too Captain Hunter” she said looking to her papers again. “Lt. Young, Porter and Leeds will stay here, in full command of the station. Commander Grant will go with me” ended Lisa and after a few seconds she clear her voice.
“That’s all you are dismissed” she said softly and respectfully and everybody stood up. Rick tried to walk next to her, but Lisa grabbed her briefcase and quickly disappeared into her office before he could reach her.


Rick was in the pilots room again. He had some reports to be filled, but he was completely lost in his thoughts. His only thought was of Lisa and how he treated her. Roy was right, she was probably punishing herself more than she should. He felt so bad, he realized how childish he still was, unable to control his own feelings, but the thought of her, flying without control gave him chills. He probably acted the wrong way with her, but he doubted he would ever forget the feeling of almost losing her.

He chilled and then he stood up and looked for some distraction. He found an old radio and CD player and beside it, some very old CDs in a corner. The construction workers probably left it there by mistake… a lucky mistake for him now. Looking to the old CDs he was glad that none of them was a Minmei’s album. Actually he didn’t know any of the albums at all. He picked up a random one, and after cleaning the dust off the music equipment, he turned it on.

Rick sit up again when the soft melody started.

Here I am
Broken wings
Quiet thoughts
Unspoken dreams
Here I am
Alone again
And I need her now
To hold my hand

Rick swallowed hard and listen carefully.

She’s all, she’s all I ever had
She’s the air I breathe
She’s all, she’s all I ever had

It’s the way she makes me feel
It’s the only thing that’s real
It’s the way she understands
She’s my lover, she’s my friend
And when I look into her eyes
It’s the way I feel inside
Like the man I want to be
She’s all I’ll ever need

He looked to his wedding band shinning on his finger. He nodded, knowing perfectly that he said all those words because he was in pain…in pain for almost losing her.

So much time
So much pain(but)
There’s one thing
That still remains (it’s the)
The way she cared
The love we shared
And through it all
She’s always been there

Rick wondered with the last line. Would she always be there for him? Even if he said those awful things about her?

She’s all, she’s all I ever had
In a world so cold, so empty
She’s all, she’s all I ever had

She’s all, she’s all I ever had
She’s the air I breathe
She’s all, she’s all I ever had

It’s the way she makes me feel
It’s the only thing that’s real
It’s the way she understands
She’s my lover, she’s my friend
And when I look into her eyes
It’s the way I feel inside
Like the man I want to be
She’s all I’ll ever need

Rick breathed hard, feeling how his throat was closing. She had so many things in her, he thought. So many things that he wasn’t. He realized how much he needed her. He realized how much he depended on her.

It’s the way she makes me feel
It’s the only thing that’s real
It’s the way she understands
She’s my lover, she’s my friend
And when I look into her eyes
It’s the way I feel inside
Like the man I want to be
She’s all I’ll ever need

When the song slowly faded, he stood up and turned off the radio. He looked at the window and from far away he saw Claudia. With a suddenly idea, he ran away looking for her.


Lisa was holding her head in her office. She couldn’t believe what she did. ‘How? HOW could I have dine that?’ she question herself over and over again. ‘What would happened if she crashed? Or worse, what would have happened if it was her fault something happened to Claudia? What would have happened if she lost her rank? Everything she worked so hard for!’. Lisa breathed hard and reclined in her chair. She closed her eyes remembering the feeling, the feeling was overwhelming, like anything she felt before. Just remembering, her heart jumped faster.

“No!” she said to herself and stood up angry with herself and walked from one corner to the other of the room.

Lisa felt worse than any other time she could remember. Ashamed. Purely and simply ashamed. She was hurt by Rick’s words, true. But she was angry with herself and her stupidity. Lisa remembered Rick’s face, absolutely and completely different from the face she was used to seeing. His face was almost on the border of panic. Pure panic. She remembered his words, so hurting…so offensive and looked away. Somehow he was right, she thought, being almost a control freak transformed her into something almost dangerous when she did lose it. She shivered.

She was so nervous than she wanted to cry, but she held herself. Shaking a little, she returned to her files, and played a random song her laptop’s song list.

You say I only hear what I want to
And you say I talk so all the time-so

And I thought what I felt was simple
And I thought that I don't belong
And now that I am leaving
Now I know that I did something wrong cause I missed you
Yeah, I missed you

The song was right, she wanted him, she needed him there with her now, holding her, telling her that everything was going to be all right.

And you say I only hear what I want to
I don't listen hard
I don't pay attention to the distance that you're running or to
Anyone, anywhere
I don't understand if you really care
I'm only hearing negative, no no no - bad

So I turned the radio on I turned the radio up
And this woman was singing my song
The lover's in love and the other's run away
The lover is crying cause the other won't stay
And some of us hover when we weep for the other who
was dying
Since the day they were born well
Well this is not that
I think that I'm throwing but I'm thrown

Lisa held her face with her hands and looked nowhere. She felt so ashamed, so bad, but she couldn’t stop the day for this, because there were so many responsibilities now in her hands. Somehow, walking in the forest was a good way to forget.

And I thought I'd live forever but now I'm not so sure
You try to tell me that I'm clever but that won't take me anyhow
Or anywhere with you

And you said that I was naive
And I thought that I was strong
I thought "hey I can leave, I can leave"
But now I know that I was wrong cause I missed you
Yeah I missed you

Lisa looked at her wedding band and played with it on her finger. She felt even worse. Rick’s words hurt her deeply, but she couldn’t forget the fear in his eyes. He was really afraid…for her.

You said "you caught me cause you want me
And one day I'll let you go"
You try to give away a keeper or keep me cause you're know
just too scared to lose

And you say, "stay"

You say I only hear what I want to.

A knock on the door make her came to reality again. She closed her laptop and said “Come in”. It was Claudia, telling her that she was going to be a little late. Lisa agreed and walked to pick up everything she needs to performed the task in the field. When she was done, she saw how the other groups walked and lost themselves in the forest. She walked to the edge of the forest and waited for Claudia when she heard the two VFs taking off and passing overhead. Lisa saw how her husband passed by doing what he was good at, flying. She looked down ashamed when she heard someone coming next to her.

“What are you doing here!” said Lisa amazed not to see Claudia, but Rick.
“I change places with her. Roy said she needed more practice piloting, because she was very insecure, so we switched places” explained Rick coming next to her.
“But..But…she didn’t tell me! And why does she needs more practice anyway? We are not going back in the air again” said Lisa walking away from him.

Rick looked at her and walked right next to her and tried to help her with the bags. But she moved away.

“I can do it myself” she said seriously and walked in the direction she was supposed to go. Inside, she felt completely confused and didn’t know what to do. She just hoped that ‘someone’ actually followed her instructions for once.

Rick walked next to her until she stopped and put the first communicator in place. The equipment was obviously heavy, but she stubbornly denied Rick’s help.

“I told you. I can do it…I don’t even know what are you doing here. You supposed to be flying and not here. I wonder when you are going to follow one of my instructions” she said pissed off and walking away, not looking at him. Rick raised an eyebrow and shut up before he said something he regretted later.

After putting several communicators in different places, both Rick and Lisa were deep in the forest. She walked quickly holding the bag and Rick followed her closer. Neither of them was speaking.

“Are you going to let me carry the bag for a while?!” asked Rick a little angry. Lisa kept walking.
“No” she said suborned.
“Damn it Lisa! Are you going to talk to me?!” he said stopping abruptly and Lisa stopped some feet away from him.
“We are working now. There is no need for us to talk” she said and accommodated the bag in her back and walked again. Rick bitted his lip and run ahead from her and faced her.
“Well…I think we need to talk” he said looking straight into her eyes. She couldn’t meet his eyes.
“Let’s move…is going to be dark soon” she said and passed him, but Rick held her arm softly but firmly and turned her around.
“Later…we need to talk” he said and grabbed the bag and put it in the floor.

Lisa couldn’t react before he took the bag away from her. He looked at her in the eyes and she looked away. He sighed and slowly touched her face.
“Lisa, look at me” he said and she nodded negative.
“Why?” he asked.
She waited a second before talked.
“Because I am mad with you and ashamed at the same time. I’m confused” she said honestly, looking to her feet.
Rick held her shoulders slowly.
“I know what I said was…awful, more than that, it was stupid and so untrue” he said with a small voice, almost crying.
Lisa looked at him slowly. She knew he was being honest with her. Rick continued.
“It is not true. It’s not. I just said it because I was absolutely and completely mad at you and I wanted to hurt you they way you hurt me with your stunt. I know it was stupid and childish and I don’t have an excuse for what I said…” he said and this time he looked to his feet.
“But what you said about Jake…is true. I acted stupidly” she said feeling guilty. Rick immediately looked at her.
“No…I mean, yes…I mean…Oh for Christ sake, Lisa! We all make mistakes, HUGE mistakes in life! You sleep with a random man been drunk and depressed, ok…who doesn’t! I mean…I slept once with a woman when I was younger just because and I couldn’t remember her name in the morning! You just have the bad luck to find ‘that’ psycho…but that is not your fault” he said and step closer. Lisa didn’t step back this time but couldn’t meet his eyes.

“I didn’t know you would have that adrenalin shock and I didn’t know how to handle it!” he said and touched her face again, this time Lisa looked down.
“I wasn’t supposed to have that!” she said murmured sadly against his hand.
“Aren’t you human?” he asked smiling a little.
“I am…But I shouldn’t… I was trained! I failed!” she replied between sad and angry with herself. Rick held her closer.
“From what I learn today, we were all trained and it don’t helps a shit when we do something different” he whispered against her hair. Lisa embraced him and hide her face against his chest.
“I feel so ashamed!” she said over and over again and he kissed her hair.
“And I was so scared” he said softly and hold her closer. Lisa cried a little.
“I’m sorry” she said against his chest, sobbing with guilt.
“I am more sorry, believe me” he said and he started crying too.

They stayed holding each other for a while, both crying until Lisa needed some air and looked up.

“I just realized that I can’t survive if I lost you Lisa” said Rick against her lips and then went down a little and kissed her hard. She responded the kiss.

“There’s so much around us…I’m sorry for what I did” she said after a while.
“You couldn’t control it…and everybody knows that” he said and cleaned her tears away with his thumb.
“But still…” she said and he shut her up with anther kiss.
“I missed you” he said after they need some air.
“I missed you too” she said and touched his face and erase his tears from his face.

They held each other for a while until they heard a little sobb from far away. They stopped and looked away when they realized it was the radio transmitter that was on. The Trio were crying from the other line. Rick smiled slowly and took it.

“Everything is fine base, you can stop listening to us now” he said and Sammie blow her nose.
“Roger that, I’m so happy, Out!” she said and cut the communication. Lisa and Rick laughed a little, both of them with their faces still wet.
“We look like shit” said Lisa and Rick laughed again.
“You always look beautiful” he said and hold her tight.
“I think we need to finished this and then go home…this was a long day” she said against his lips and she kissed him this time.
“We are not going anywhere if you keep doing that” he said biting her lower lip softly. Lisa smiled.
“Later” she said and kissed his neck.
“That’s cheating” said Rick holding his breath and Lisa looked at him.
“C’mon…I want to go home, let’s finish this” she said finally.

They ended putting and checking all the transmitters and returned to the base. Lisa and Rick were both too tired and as soon as they reached home, they ate something, they said goodnight to everyone and went to their bedroom. Once there, they were both emotionally and physically exhausted, so they just shared a shower and then went straight to bed, falling asleep cuddling each other as soon as they touched the pillow.


Disclaimer: BITTERSWEET DESTINY is a fanfiction written by Carla Aguilar (nickname Carla “Fox”). ROBOTECH and all other related characters, names, and indicia are trademarks of Harmony Gold USA, Inc. This fanfic was written for noncommercial purposes. Any other popular private references, belongs to their owners. No infringement is intended. Santiago de Chile, Online since 2003.
About my original characters.