A new day had
come to Lisa Hayes and she couldn't stop thinking of all the little
things she did the day before and how mundane and unimportant they
looked at that moment, but now she would give anything to have them
back again. Those little meaningless things like stopping in a random
coffee shop in the middle of a random street and just stay there,
not needing the company of anyone. It wasn't like she was shutting
people out, but after so many years looking for solitude, she was
a lonelier person, and she was used to that.
In some moment, being alone and being independent were synonyms,
and maybe that was the reason why was so hard for her to accept
all of this. Of course that, and the fact that she was getting married.
of that made Lisa shudder when she was looking outside from her
bedroom window to the now sunny day. She took a big breath and closed
her eyes, letting the sun warm her skin and giving her part of the
energy that she so desperate needed right now. What was she thinking
when she agreeed to this!, well…exactly that was the problem,
she answered herself, "you weren't thinking at all, because
in the moment that Rick looked at you and the both of you start
that staring contest, you couldn't think again, Hayes" said
sarcastically that little voice inside her head.
her head trying to shut up the voice and just opened her eyes to
see the green and blue outside. It was ironic that in such a beautiful
day she was stuck in her house, thinking of her wedding….her
wedding…how odd sounds that!, specially because of all of
her confued emotions right now. She was getting married with the
man she loves with all her soul, but for all the wrong reasons.
Lisa sighed and started playing with her fingers, looking lost.
Why did her life suddenly transforms into this? She was a lonely
person with a platonic love for someone who was younger and full
of confusion. That was something she knew how to handle, that and
thousands of soldiers, military personal, ranks and weapons. But
notice Claudia looking at her from the doorframe of her bedroom.
She had her arms crossed and her head support in the frame. She
thought about her best friend there, almost like a sister, a very
stubborn sister. Her temper was something that had two sizes, she
thought. In some angle, her stubborness plus her intelligence were
what made her survive all these years and with her survival, almost
everyone in the SDF 1 and why not to say? The world. She was the
unknown heroin who worked in silence for the well been of everybody.
But in other even as much good that side of her temper was, wasn't
enough to compensate the negative aspect of it.
She closed herself
to everyone, she even try to shut out her closest people. She did
it with her father, even he apparently didn't say anything for try
to change that behavior, but even all that, he was her father after
all. And she tries to keep Claudia and Roy out, but luckily, they
were as stubborn as her. They just didn't let her do that, they
almost kidnapped her every weekend for a couple of hours to make
her "live", as Roy liked to say. Almost nobody knew about
this, that was one of the implicit conditions that Lisa expressed,
just with her eyes every time they looked at her.
morning, Roy knocked on her door at 8 AM and made her go out with
him and run. That was a routine they begun after Lisa's father died.
In his logic, Roy thought that a good way to keep out bad memories
and just the excess of thoughts was to get tired with physically
activity. Of course, at the beginning Lisa complained or just didn't
open her door at all. Sadly for her, Claudia gave Lisa's key to
Roy once and he made his own copy. Those days were funny, Claudia
thought smiling to herself for a second, remembering when Lisa called
her and screamed and curseed telling her that Roy not just scared
the hell out of her when he enters her house making noise, but getting
really angry when he splashed some water on her and making her jump
from her bed. Claudia laughed her lungs out from the phone that
time when Lisa told her this, and even she was screaming angry and
Roy was obviously running away when she threw a shoe into his direction,
Lisa couldn't hide the fact that she was glad. After the jogging
session, where Roy made her talk all the way, even if he had to
bother her, they'd come back to Roy and Claudia's place. When they
arrived, Claudia always have sweets for breakfast, knowing that
Lisa's couldn't say no to certain cakes and candy's. After breakfast,
Lisa and Claudia got back to her place, she showered and changed
and Claudia push her to the mall or the movies or any activity on
town. True to be told, mostly every single piece of clothing that
wasn't a uniform in Lisa's closet was because Claudia make her buy
it or bought it herself. Those moments between the two friends where
most appreciated for both, because Lisa opened up easily (specially
because she ended up telling more of what she thought to Roy when
they were running) and Claudia could talk about things that Roy
just couldn't understand. After lunch, Claudia and Lisa go to each
home. Lisa knew that even though they were her step family, they
needed time to be alone, and just on rare occasions she agreed to
meet them on Saturday night. That dynamic transformation into a
catharsis that kept Lisa, in some ways, alive.
sadly for a second. Today was Saturday.
Lisa felt the
presence of Claudia and turned around to meet her. They looked at
each other for a second, without words. They were alone, Roy went
with Rick because they needed to change, Roy was going to bring
some clothes to Claudia on the way back.
- You should
go home Claudia, I'm going to be alright.
- I Know - said
Claudia and walked next to her - but it's not wise to be alone right
now, we don't know if Jake is around here.
- Yeah, he could
be anywhere - said Lisa looking outside.
- Hey, cheer
up a little - Claudia turned her around and made her look at her
- try to look on the good side, you are going to marry the man you
love - she wink at her.
down and sighed and nodded a "no" to her.
- He doesn't
love me Claudia, he's just doing it for pity, and I don't know why
I'm allowing this.
- Well, ok,
you have a point - said Claudia walking to the edge of the bed and
sitting there - but you must be blind if you think Rick is not attracted
Lisa sat next
to her and looked at the ceiling, blushing a little.
- Oh well, maybe,
but that's not enough for get married.
- No, but in
the situation, it's the only option.
- True, but
what I can don't understand is why is he doing it…
- Oh well, who
knows? There are confused people and Rick Hunter.
a little and after a while she turned serious again.
- I'm afraid
I'm going to make his life miserable. He doesn't love me, he loves
- He "believes"
he loves her. I can put my hands on the fire on that, he just has
the crush of the century for her, but he doesn't love her, he still
don't know what love is.
at her asking a silent why. Claudia let herself fall onto the bed,
looking at the ceiling.
- Can you still
describe what you felt the first time you saw Karl?
for a moment, remembering those times, now so far away.
- He was the
most handsome man I ever saw. I specially remembered his eyes, the
intense way he looked at everything. He own the place when he entered
a room, no matter which one was or who was there. I remembered that
my hear jump and I felt like there was nobody except we on the room…and
we he looked at me, I felt so…precious, so special…
- Well honey,
is that the way Rick made you feel now?
- Oh no! - and
she laughed a sad laugh - Rick makes me feel so different. He challenges
me, it's like every time I'm with him I have to be ready, and even
if he's not around, I remembered what he said, what he make me angry.
In some way, when I'm with him, I feel alive, because it's like….I
don't know….it's like he is capable to bring out my best and
my worst. He is…I don't know exactly…is…is like
he makes me feel like my skin is alive, that every nerve in me is
- So, what you
are saying is when you meet Carl for the first time, you were concentrated
mostly in what he did or not, in extreme words, he was a god and
you were just lucky to have his attention -
Lisa raise an
eyebrow at that
- Hehehe, well…not
exactly that but that's the idea, and now, with Rick, you are most
amazed of what he's is capable to do to you. You fancy him intellectually,
mentally and physically, but after all this time, he's capable
to make you feel alive, right?
- Well, in my
book, the first one is a crush, and the second one is love. Because
when you have the first crush, you realize for the first time how
wonderful can be someone else, for the first time you feel and discovered
what the opposite sex is, or in some case the same sex - and Claudia
winked at her and Lisa laugh - The first time your senses are full
of the exquisite feeling for the other, but after that, with time,
you realize not just the good and bad of the other person, but you
find out what the other is capable of doing to you everyday. Sometimes
even after a while you discovered that the guy you choose, even
if he is good and nice, don't make you feel anything, well…all
depends of your temper, and thinking in yours, I think feeling alive
is exactly what you need…I really think that, when people
say opposites attract each
other is because we are looking for that someone that make you whole.
at her friend for a long moment, and then smiled a little.
- Now I understand
what you mean with the "crush of the century".
- Yeah, he's
is Mister Crush.
Lisa fell onto
her bed next to Claudia, looking at the ceiling thinking.
- I just hope
that changes, and I hope that I am what he needs to be whole.
- I know that
you are what he needs to be complete. I just hope he finds out soon
- What happens
if he doesn't?
we catch Jake, you two can get a divorce..
stop a sudden shudder and she open her eyes wider, still looking
at the ceiling, and Claudia notice and look at her.
- Think of this
as an opportunity Lisa, I'm pretty sure you are meant to be with
- But what if
we are not? What if he can't stop feeling for Minmei and I'm just
going to make him and myself miserable? What if Jake we never find
- That's a lot
of "what ifs" I don't have the answer to sweetie, I just
think we have to hope for the best, the rest? Well…we will
figure it out...But what I really think you should do right now
is go and take a
guys are going to be here soon anyway…-she rolled her eyes.
and got up.
- Yeah, and
you better leave me some hot water for me!
- All right,
all right…- and Lisa walked to the bathroom she stop when
- Hey, don't
underestimated Rick, you know? He could say no, but he didn't. Nobody
made him agree, and he's not a baby… not anymore.
She just look
at her and nodded, then disappeared into bathroom.
into his house and closed the door behind him, trying to leave behind
everything that happened the past few days. One part of him wished
he never brought those reports to Lisa, that part wanted to stay
home and forget everything. Another part of him said the complete
opposite, that it was more than all right to go through with this,
that he can make a big difference in the life of someone he cared
about. But wasn't that a lot to ask for himself? He wasn't giving
money or time, he was giving, literally, his life for this!. Rick
sighed and sat on the cold floor and stayed there. Why did he agree?
What was Minmei going to think of all this!. Minmei, that was a
subject that was going through his mind since he left Lisa's house.
Curiously, she wasn't on his mind when he was there. Why was that?,
why when he looked at Lisa's eyes he simplly stopped thinking anything
and he started just to feel that he wanted to hold her tight and
kiss her? Why sometimes when they were arguing with each other the
idea to kiss her just to shut up jumped suddenly in his brain?
Rick shook his
head and breathed hard, this wasn't the moment to think about those
things, then he realized suddenly that it was exactly the moment
to consider those things! He was going to marry her after all!.
He stood up and walked to his bathroom, a good shower was what he
needs right now.
When Rick entered
his little bathroom the first thing he noticed was how empty it
was, just what was necessary. When he ran to Lisa's bathroom, he
stayed there, hiding for a while, and looked around, even if that
wasn't a very nice thing to do. He was surprised when he found a
lot of bottles of salts of different, bubbles bath, lotions, sponges
and a lot of nice bath products. His first thought was that was
strange for someone like Lisa, but on second thought he remembered
how much she worked and that was normal for someone to look for
some relaxation. Then he notice the bathroom, very clean, but very
comfortable: a nice bathtub, really soft towels, some candles. Everything
what you need for a nice bath. Her bathroom wasn't fancy at all,
and was very welcoming.
Rick stood there
and then look at his own, almost…blank. For a second, he made
a face and wished to be able to take a shower in her bathroom and
spoil himself with those products, even if was kind of girly…maybe
he can find some fun in it…then he thought about the kind
of fun…and he blushed furiously. He gulped, walked to the
shower and turned on the hot water. He picked up some clean clothes,
and when he came back in, the steam was everywhere.
When he was
ready, he went into the shower and left the water do the magic,
specially on his sore neck muscles. Sleeping in that chair was really
uncomfortable, but he didn't sleep that much either. He felt asleep
a lot time after Claudia and Roy. From his point of view he saw
Lisa and couldn't stop wondering about everything about her. The
situation was far away from odd, it was almost unbelievable, but
what shocked himself most was his own behavior. Rick sighed in the
shower and closed his eyes for a second, and let the water wash
him from everything. He turned around and put some shampoo on his
hand and washed his hair, but didn't notice that he left it there
when he begin thinking again. Did he like Lisa in the first place?
A voice inside his head told him that he liked her more than what
he wanted to admit, that he wanted her badly mind, soul…and
body. That was one truth that be must confronted in the morning,
when Claudia just said aloud what Lisa felt for him and what he
felt for her. Did she really love him as she said? He wasn't sure
or maybe he didn't accept that fact right now, told him again the
little voice in his head.
The water ran
against his body and he didn't notice it at all, he was against
the wall, looking from the ceiling to the floor and couldn't manage
a single line of thoughts. In some way, what happened in the morning
left him wondering, mostly, about his own behavior. He felt so…so…so
complicated when he was around Lisa, and so simple at the same time.
When he was with her, he couldn't stop feeling the challenge, that
he always could do better, that he was almost lazy in some issues,
which was true, spoke again the little voice. When he was with her,
he always discovered something new about himself, and that scared
him the most, because he realized that he was just a in a journey
of self discovery. When he was with her he felt that he was almost
a kid, that he was immature and stupid. But at the same time, been
with her was synonym of go further, of and unlimited possibilities
for him and for her, because every time he discovered something
new about her. And in some point, he started feeling more than physically
attracted to her. When he listened to her story, he felt angry and
pain. Why pain? Because he was supposed to be the hero after all.
And she was closer to him, he was angry with himself. Maybe that's
why he agreed to do this, because deep down, he felt that she was
When Rick let
this thoughts speak to him for the first time, he panicked. He couldn't
deny that he was feeling more and more for this women than he want
to admit. He shook his head and tried to recover those simple thought
of two days ago, when the most important thing was Minmei. Minmei…OH
God, he realized…what
he was going to say to her! She wasn't going to understand, and
she neededs him!…Oh well, maybe not that much, the voice said
again. Last time what she needed from you wasn't "you"
exactly, but was what you can bring with you, an excuse to run away
for a couple of hours.
She wasn't the
same girl he met. Well…it wasn't fair either to complain about
this, because he wasn't the same boy she met him. They both grow
up in different directions, and even though they tried to get through
this, it was an impossible task, specially because Rick was doing
mostly all the work to keep that relationship. But still…he
needed to talked with her and…try to make her understand.
In that moment,
part of the shampoo of his hair fell into his eyes and he cried
aloud. He sprayed it away with the water and started with the soap.
What he was
going to do with her, he didn't know. Minmei was so simple that
sometimes it was difficult to get along with her. Everything was
black or white with her, good or bad, love or hate. He shuddered
a little, that was going to be more annoying than difficult. Then
he thought about all the people they needed to informed of the real
situation, Max and Miriya, Gloval, Sammie, Vanessa and Kim. They
were important people in both of their lives, and they couldn't
lie to them. No way…Lisa never would let him lie to them,
and then he chuckled a little. In some ways they were already married
in so many ways. He stopped and stood straight, letting the water
rinse him while he kept thinking… there were some "aspecst"
they needed to talked about, things that married couples do...
The moment Rick
thought about this, his eyes grew wider and images of a couple of
dreams come to his brain in a second, pretty good dreams actually…Oh
no…no, no, no, Rick turned around with all his willpower and
turned the cold water on very fast.