DYRL, Two Sides By Dwparsnip

fanfic_name = *Two Sides

chapter = 2

author = Dwparsnip

dedicate = Everyone at DYRL, with a special mention to Aiki for looking this over for me.

Rating = AP15

Type = Angst

fanfic = Admiral Lisa Hunter sat in the command seat of the SDF-3. The bridge was a buzz with activity following a battery of dry runs at a fold operation.

The tests didn’t go well, and the command crew braced for the worst from their commanding officer.

Lisa stood up from her seat and slowly, deliberately walked around the bridge, and as she did so she hesitated just for a second at each station. She didn’t say a word, and she noticed small beads of sweat on all of them, except of course for Forsythe. He was the most experienced officer among them, and he was always cool under pressure.

She went to the door to her office off to the port side of the bridge and turned to look at her officers. Again except for Forsythe, they all regarded her with awe and a little fear.

She cleared her throat to hide her smile, and when she spoke she spoke sternly. “Captain Forsythe, I want those drills run until we get them right. Practice makes perfect, so the saying goes, and we have a lot of practicing to do, if what just happened is the best we an do.”

Forsythe looked at her and replied, “Yes, ma’am.”

“I am going into my office to finish the mountain of paperwork on my desk, and so help me, I’ll throw anyone who disturbs me in the brig and court martial them when I get around to it, which at the rate I’ve been going will be in three or four years. Understood.” Her eyes narrowed as she took in each of her officers.

They all replied in the affirmative and she went into her office.

She collapsed in her chair and began to look over one of the many reports she had to get through before the engineering meeting she had in about an hour or so. She was so tired, exhausted really, but she couldn’t stop.

‘Almost 1800 hours’, she said to herself.

As she got to the edge of the page, her attention floated to the picture she had on her desk of her and Rick on their wedding day.

She thought of her husband and she smiled. Things hadn’t been that great for them lately. With their respective responsibilities, time for them to spend together had been short…way too short. She missed him terribly, and it was the reason she had locked herself in her office, so she could get this done and go home and be with him.

When she remembered that, she forced her attention back to the report.

She got halfway through the page when the communication console beeped at her. She answered it.

‘Lisa’, came Dr. Jean Grant’s voice. ‘When you get a chance tomorrow can you stop by? I need your advice on something.’

Lisa smiled a polite smile and said calmly, “Sure Jean. Give me a call tomorrow and remind me.”

‘Thanks Lisa’, and Jean cut the connection.

Lisa started reading the report again, and again got halfway through the page when the communication console beeped.

She hit the button. ‘Admiral, this is Lieutenant Harper in the galley. We’re having a problem with some of the menu choices for next weeks banquet and we need your input.’

Lisa wanted to scream but instead said calmly, “Can it wait until tomorrow, Lieutenant?”

‘Yes, ma’am, whenever you get a chance. Thank you, ma’am. Galley out.’

She took the report in her hand again and this time the console beeped before she even had a chance to begin reading it.

She slammed the report on her desk and activated the console again.

Rick’s face appeared on the screen, and when he saw that she noticed him he smiled and said, ‘Hi Lisa. How are you?’

She couldn’t keep the frustration out of her voice. “I’m fine Rick. I’d be better if I could get some of this work done.”

‘I’m sorry to interrupt you, Lisa, I just needed to see you and hear your voice.’

“I’m sorry, Rick, not now”, and she closed the channel.

She instantly regretted closing the channel and being so aloof with Rick. She was tired and frustrated though not with him, yet it was him that she took it out on. She had been doing that a lot recently, and hated herself for it. ‘The only person I really wanted to talk to all day and I treated him like that!’

She was about to call him back and apologize, but she saw the report and remembered. ‘If I can get through these damn reports, I can go home and really surprise him.’

She disabled the communication console’s audio alert and started reading the report, and without the interruptions from the communicator she was done in minutes. She kept going through the reports so that by the time her meeting came around she was finished.

‘I’m going to turn the ringer off more often’, she thought.

She reactivated the ringer and almost immediately it beeped. She sighed and activated the channel. She smiled and said, “Hi Miriya, how are you?”

‘I am well, Admiral’, came the reply. ‘Max asked me to call you to see if you and Rick wanted to get together with us this evening.’

Lisa said regretfully, “Sorry, Miriya. After I finish this meeting I have in a few minutes, I’m going to go find my husband and spend a nice romantic evening with him.”

Miriya smiled a wide smile and said happily, ‘Understood, Admiral. What is it Max always says? Ah yes, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

Lisa laughed hard and said, “Okay, Miriya. Talk to you later.”

She leaned back in her chair and looked at the clock. Her last appointment was with Commander Stevens, and he would be by any minute. She closed her eyes and thought of Rick. It had been so long since they had a romantic night together, and just the thought of being with him aroused her desires and emotions to levels she hadn’t felt in a long time. She was winding herself up, and though she knew it was a bad idea she couldn’t help herself.

She reached for the communications console and dialed the Sit. Room. She needed to see him and talk to him, to make sure everything was okay for tonight.

‘Sit. Room, Lieutenant Harrison.’

“Lieutenant, could you get Admiral Hunter for me please?”

‘I’ll see if he’s back, ma’am.’

‘Back? From where?’ , she asked herself.

There was a knock on her door and she told whomever it was to enter. The door opened and Lt. Commander Isaac Stevens came in, and Lisa motioned for him to sit on the couch, which he did.

‘Admiral Hunter, he isn’t in the Sit. Room right now, ma’am. Can I take a message for him.’

She thought for a second. “No Lieutenant, thank you. I’ll catch him later.” She closed the channel and got up, walked to the couch and sat down.

Stevens handed her a copy of his report. “I’m sorry to have kept you waiting, Commander”, she apologized.

“No need, Admiral. You’re a very busy woman. Shall I begin?”, he asked.

Lisa took a deep breath, stifled a yawn and looked at him sheepishly. “Sorry, it’s been a long day. By all means, go ahead.”

He started the report he had compiled about the latest test results on the power generators.

He was a couple of minutes into the report when Lisa felt her eyes glaze over. She felt herself drift towards sleep, even though she could hear Stevens talking to her and she began to daydream about Rick. She saw his bright blue eyes filled with laughter, his dark, messy hair that always tried for some reason to cover his eyes and she saw his strong yet tender lips.

Her head nodded forward as she almost dozed off and she dropped the copy of the report she had been holding. She reached for the report on the floor, and as her hand got to the paper Stevens’ hand landed on top of hers. He took her hand in his and brought them up to rest on her lap.

Still half asleep and the visions of Rick still in her head, she looked at the man holding her hand and saw Rick’s blue eyes, felt Rick’s touch and saw Rick’s lips.

She closed her eyes as she was kissed and though something wasn’t right, she pressed on, assuming the unfamiliarity was due to her and Rick’s mini separation. She held his face in her hands and leaned back on to the arm of the couch, pulling him along without breaking their kiss.

His body was pressing against hers and her desires were running in overdrive as she felt his hands caressing her, and she kissed him harder.

‘It’s so different’, she thought. ‘Has it really been that long?’

She felt his hand take the zipper of her uniform and begin to pull it down, very slowly. She responded by rubbing his arms. ‘Even his arms are different. Wait. Something is wrong.’

Her zipper was almost undone when she broke their kiss and said breathlessly, “Rick?”

She opened her eyes and got the shock of her life. She wasn’t looking into the blue eyes of her husband, but the brown eyes of Lieutenant Commander Stevens.

She came to her senses and immediately pushed him off her and got up off the couch. She walked quickly behind her desk and felt the rush of red go to her cheeks, and she couldn’t decide if it was anger, embarrassment or both.

She realized her uniform zipper was down and yanked it up.

She stammered when she spoke. “I’m sorry…Commander…I don’t know what came over me.” She raised her right hand to her head and ran it through her brown hair, brushing it back out of her face in the process. “I was so tired and I was thinking about my husband…I just…” She looked at him with a horrified expression. “I’m so sorry.”

He looked at her and said calmly, “No need to apologize, Admiral. In fact, I should apologize to you. When you didn’t remove your hand from mine I assumed that something was there, and I kissed you. I was, obviously, mistaken. I am terribly sorry, ma’am.”

He looked at her and saw that she was still pretty shaken up. “Admiral, would it be okay with you if we forgot it happened? It was a mistake, brought on by your fatigue and my misunderstanding. Nothing more.”

She appreciated what he was saying and nodded her head. “I would really appreciate that, Commander.”

She hesitated but finally said, “If it’s all the same to you, Commander, could we finish this…your briefing… some other time?”

He gathered his files and replied, “Of course, Admiral.” He walked to the door and as he took the handle he looked at her and said sincerely, “I am truly sorry, ma’am.”

Before she could say anything else to him he opened the door and left. When she heard the door close she dropped to her knees by her desk and shook life a leaf in a hurricane.

‘What have I done?’, she asked herself with a mixture of disgust, anger and disbelief.

Several minutes passed before she could get up, and when she did, her legs were still rubbery.

She sat down in her chair with her elbows on her desk and her hands on her head.

“Rick”, she said with tears in her eyes and sorrow in her voice.

She took deep breaths and tried to calm down. After several moments she calmed down enough to activate the communications console. She brought up the bridge first. Even though the bridge was only a couple of meters away, she wasn’t sure she could trust herself to go there.

‘Forsythe here, Admiral.’

“I’m calling it a night Captain. See you in the morning.”

‘Good night, Admiral. Bridge out.’

Five minutes later, Admiral Lisa Hunter fell asleep on her couch.

She dreamed of Rick and her son, their times together and the laughter they shared. It was the most wonderful feeling she felt, seeing them together.

‘Mommy’, Roy was saying to her, ‘Mommy it’s time to wake up. Mommy, wake up…’

Wake up.

She opened her eyes and immediately felt pain in her neck, the pain that came with sleeping in an unnatural position. She stretched out the kinks that would go away and glanced at the clock.

‘O655?’, she thought in amazement.

She got up and headed into the bedroom, but when she got to the door she realized that she was still alone in her quarters. Their bed was still made up as though no one had slept in it. She took a look inside the bathroom and came back into the living room. There was no sign of Rick anywhere. ‘He didn’t come home’, she realized.

She blinked her eyes together several times, trying to make sure she was awake and fully functional, when her eyes fell upon an envelope by the door.

As she picked it up, she realized that someone had slipped it underneath the door, and that her name written on the envelope was written in Rick’s handwriting. She opened the envelope and took out the note that was inside.

She read:

‘To: Admiral Lisa Hunter.

Admiral,

I am writing this note to you to inform you that at 0700 hours this morning I will be taking a three-day vacation off the ship. I have accumulated more than enough leave time to cover this time off. I have requisitioned an Alpha for the purpose of traveling, and have left instructions with General Max Sterling on how to reach me should it be necessary.

(Signed) Admiral Rick Hunter.’

She read the note again, and then again.

‘Vacation? What is he doing? Why did he leave a note?’

“Rick”, she said out loud. She looked at the clock again. It read 0701, and she headed out the door.

She ran to the Flight Control section of the hangar deck, and when she entered the room, the duty officer, a young female Lieutenant saluted and said, “Welcome to Flight Control, Admiral Hunter. Is there something I can do for you, ma’am?”

Lisa ignored her and listened to one of the controllers as he spoke into his microphone.

“Roger, Admiral Hunter. Your call sign for this flight will be Tango Three, please confirm.”

She rushed to that controller and said quietly, “Stall him, Lieutenant.”

She heard Rick say over the speaker, ‘Confirmed, Flight Control. Call sign Tango Three.’

“Stand by, Tango Three.” He looked up at Lisa and said, “Yes, ma’am?”

Lisa looked at the flight status of Tango Three. Fully fueled with extra fuel tanks. No flight plan was listed. Three days was the time allotted for the Alpha requisition.

Lisa looked at the female Lieutenant and said quietly, “I need to talk to him privately.”

“Yes, ma’am”, said the Lieutenant. She pointed to the office and said, “I’ll patch him through to you in there.”

“Thank you, Lieutenant.” Lisa walked calmly into the office and shut the door.

She sat down and activated the communication console just in time to hear Rick say, ‘Flight Control, what’s the problem up there?’

She said softly into the communication unit, “Rick.”

When he didn’t respond she tried again to talk to him. “Rick. What’s going on? Where are you going?”

She activated the visual feed, but he wasn’t accepting visual communications, and she was beginning to feel a sense of deep dread wash over her. This was so unlike Rick, to just decide to take off, and it shocked and upset her that he was going to leave without saying good-bye.

His face came up on the view screen and she immediately noticed the bags under his eyes. More importantly, she noticed that his usually bright, blue eyes were blank and faded. The last time she saw his eyes like that was a very long time ago.

‘I’m taking a three day vacation, Admiral.’

‘He’s calling me ‘Admiral’. Even in his note he called me that, not Lisa.’

She tried to sound calm as she asked, “What’s wrong, Rick?”

‘Nothing Admiral. I just wanted to leave the ship for a few days.’

‘He sounds so tired and so…angry, no not angry. Hurt? Leave the ship?’

She was more worried about him than she had ever been. She needed desperately to talk to him. “Rick, please come up here and talk to me.”

His response was void of feeling. ‘Negative, Admiral. I’m ready to go, and I would prefer to wait…to talk to you.’

“Wait to talk to me? Why? About what? Rick! Talk to me, please!”, she pleaded. The look on his face was neutral…but his eyes.

‘Is this a secure channel?’

It wasn’t, so she reached to the console and activated the security protocol to lock down the frequency and encrypt their conversation. “It is now. What’s going on? Why did you leave me a note instead of talking to me?”

He looked away from her and asked, ‘How was your day yesterday?’

‘Of all the questions to ask right now.’

Her voice betrayed her confusion when she said, “What? Fine. Rick please…”

He still avoided her eyes as he asked quietly, ‘A lot of meetings?’

Dumbfounded, she simply replied, “Yes.”

He finally looked at her and asked, ‘How was your meeting with Commander Stevens?’

She was floored by that question. She was caught completely off guard and she knew that the drain of color from her face was telling him everything, but she was powerless to stop it.

She stammered, “Stevens. Fine…that meeting was…fine.”

‘It looked like it was a lot more than fine to me, Admiral’, he said curtly.

‘It looked…what is he saying?’ To him she asked, “What are you talking about Rick?”, but she already knew the answer.

He knew.

His voice faltered just the tiniest bit. ‘I saw you, Admiral. I saw you kiss him.’

She could feel the surprise register on her face, even though she realized that he knew. “How did…Rick?”

As he closed his eyes he said, ‘I missed you yesterday.’ She saw him open his eyes to look at her, and when he did she was sure that his eyes had faded even more. ‘I called you and you were so…distant, and I missed you…so much. I took an Alpha out for a flight and decided to surprise you by going to Battloid and knocking on your office window, but when I looked inside I got the surprise.’

“Rick, you don’t understand…”, she tried to explain, but he wouldn’t listen.

‘That’s an understatement’, he interrupted. ‘I saw you Lisa. I saw you hold hands. I saw you kiss him. I saw you pull him over to lie on top of you. And I saw him undo your uniform.’

She was devastated by the pain and anger in his voice. He thought that she had deliberately cheated on him and kissed another man, even made love to him. She could feel her eyes well up with tears and she was about to tell him that she didn’t sleep with Stevens. “Rick you’ve got to listen to me! It wasn’t…”

‘Don’t you dare cry, Admiral. What right do you have to cry right now?’

The anger in his voice surprised her and she instinctively winced. They had had plenty of arguments over the years, what married couple didn’t, but he had never sounded as angry and hurt as he did right now.

Again she tried to explain, “Rick, there’s more to it, it’s not what you think. I didn’t realize it wasn’t …”

He shook his head and said, ‘Admiral, I need to be alone right now. I need to know what I am feeling before I can even begin to talk about this, and I can’t do that aboard ship.’

“Rick, where…”

Again he interrupted he. ‘I’ve left orders for Max to take control of the Sit. Room, and he has my flight plan and destination. Please don’t ask him anything about it, unless it’s an emergency. You owe me that much.’

Lisa cried freely, the huge drops falling from her cheeks to her uniform. She couldn’t stop it even if she wanted to. Her husband was telling her that he was leaving, and even though it was for a few days, it was more than she could stand.

“Rick, I love you.”

She saw him clear the secure channel protocol and said, ‘Flight Control, do I have permission to leave or not?’

Lisa realized that anything else she said right now would only hurt him further. He had made up his mind, and he hadn’t had time enough to calm down and listen. As much as it hurt her, she had to give him what he wanted…time. ‘Let him calm down, Lisa’, she thought to herself. ‘When he calms down and listens, he’ll understand.’ She hoped.

She softly said, “Yes.”

She heard Flight Control grant his permission to eave and his acknowledgement. She looked at him as he prepared to take off, and when he looked at her again she slowly brought her hand up to her lips and planted a kiss there. Then she gently placed her hand on the monitor, as gently as though she were placing her kiss directly on his lips.

When he broke the connection, her heart broke along with it.

Seconds later he was gone. Lisa cleaned her face as well as she could and left Flight Control without saying a word.

As she walked through her ship her mind was filled with thoughts of the past twelve hours. It was all a jumble of words, images and feelings…strong feelings of pain and hopelessness.

‘How could I have let this happen?’, she said to herself, mystified at how things spiraled so out of control. She remembered the look of loss in his eyes. ‘He was so angry and so hurt. I just wish I could have made him listen. Why couldn’t you just listen to me, Rick?’

She looked up and found herself outside the Situation Room.

‘I need to know he’s okay’, she thought as she opened the door to go inside. She looked around at the hustle and bustle. It was always like that in during the workday.

“Admiral on deck!”, announced one of the security officers stationed at the door.

The activity in the Sit. Room ground to a halt in a hurry, and she found her voice and said loudly, “As you were.” With her words, the activity resumed in earnest.

She eyed one of the three big radar screens at the far end of the room, and without taking her eyes off of it she slowly walked down to stand in front of it. She scantly noticed the visual representations of other REF ships, the planets and so forth, and concentrated on a single blip that was approaching the fourth planet of the system. It was the blip the board had designated as Tango Three.

She looked at the female radar technician sitting at the screen’s control console and asked, “Lieutenant, could you please put the flight path of Tango Three on the screen?”

The tech obliged, and Lisa looked at the journey that Rick had taken so far.

She recognized almost immediately. ‘Our honeymoon’, she thought warmly. ‘It’s the exact path he took when he flew us to the Planetia Colony.’

She jumped a little as she was startled by the touch of a hand on her shoulder.

She turned around to see Max with his hands up in surrender. ”I’m sorry, Lisa, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“It’s okay, Max. I was...in another world I think.” She turned to look at the screen again and noticed that Rick was slowing down by ‘Castor’.

Max lowered his voice to a whisper and asked Lisa, “What’s going on, Lisa? Why did Rick take off this morning? All he left me was a note.”

Before Lisa could say anything to Max, a message came through the Sit. Room’s speakers.

‘Tango Three to SDF-3! Emergency message! There are three, I say again three Invid Carriers hiding behind ‘Castor’. Do you copy SDF-3?’

Everyone looked at the radar screen, but saw nothing by the moon, only Rick’s Alpha and a couple of big rocks.

Lisa looked at Max, who just shook his head at her. ‘He doesn’t see anything. Still, Rick doesn’t see things either.’

The radar tech that Lisa had asked to put Rick’s trail on the screen opened a channel to him and said, “Tango Three, we’re not picking up any ships on our scopes.”

As the tech spoke to Rick, she picked up a communication headset and called the bridge. By that time, Forsythe had assumed his station. “Captain, place the ship and the rest of the fleet on full alert, we have intelligence that there may be three Invid Carriers within striking distance.”

‘Yes, ma’am’, was his reply, and a second later the red alert lights lit up.

At the same time that Lisa issued orders to the bridge, Max issued orders to scramble the Skull.

She turned her attention back to Rick as he said, ‘Neither do I, SDF-3. But I have visual confirmation of three Invid Carriers!’

Her heart was pounding in fear for her husband’s safety. She was just about to tell him to get back to the ship when Max beat her to it.

“Return to ship immediately, Rick”, said Max with authority. And he had it, as the commander of the Sit. Room his orders held almost as much weight as her own.

‘Are you picking them up yet Max?’, asked Rick.

Max checked the board one more time and responded, “Negative Tango Three. Return to ship immediately.”

She looked at the board herself and could still see only Rick’s alpha.

Rick replied, ‘If you can’t see them, you need someone to be your eyes.’

But Max was waiting for that answer and said immediately, “Rick, the Skull is already on their way to your position. They will handle it. Get back here now!”

‘Sorry Max, but you can’t give me orders.’

Before Max could say anything to that, Lisa leaned in close to the microphone, and despite the fear and dread she was feeling in the pit of her stomach she said in her coolest, most authoritative voice, “Admiral Hunter, you are ordered to return to the ship immediately.”

‘Stand by SDF-3’, was his response, and for the umpteenth time since she had met Rick Hunter she asked herself, ‘Why can’t he just follow orders?’

Lisa and Max watched as a male radar tech in front of them worked his keyboard, trying to find what it was that Rick was seeing.

Over the speakers came a burst of static, followed by a rather nasty expletive from Rick.

Terribly afraid, Lisa gripped the back of the radar tech’s chair and heard Max say in a panic, “What is it Rick?”

Lisa looked at Max as Rick said hurriedly, ‘I’m under attack. Looked like six, maybe eight Invid Enforcers. I’ll try to outrun them, while I fine-tune the radar.’

A few seconds passed and Lisa was so gripped with fear that all she could do was listen to Rick and Max.

‘Tango Three to SDF-3. Tune radar and sensor harmonics to frequency 3368.673 gigahertz.’

The radar tech did so without waiting for approval from Max or Lisa, and was rewarded a moment later when the radar screen shimmered and the truth of the situation came into focus on the screen.

There was another burst of static. ‘Max, I’m reading nine Enforcers on my tail. How far away is the Skull?’

Max took a quick look at the screen and said with regret, “They’re still 4 minutes away Rick.”

Rick understood. ‘No good, Max. The Enforcers will be on me in one minute. I’m going to have to fight them.’

At that Lisa came out of her shell and shouted in to the mic, “Rick, you can’t!”

When Rick’s voice came back it was confident. ‘I don’t have a choice, Admiral.’

She was about to say something else, give him another order, beg him to come home, but Max silenced her when he put her hand on her shoulder. She looked at him, ready to have it out with him for stopping her, but the look in his face stopped her. He slowly shook his head and said very quietly, “You’ll only distract him, Lisa.”

She knew he was right. Rick would need to focus on combat and survival, and having her scream and yell at him over the TAC net would do him no good at all.

She nodded and turned her attention back to the screen to see that Rick had launched some missiles and had taken out two of the nine pursuers. She watched the blip of Tango Three head straight for the enemy in a zigzag pattern and her heart stopped and didn’t start again until she saw that he had broken through the line and reduced their number to two.

She heard Max whistle and exclaim quietly, “No rust there!”

She noticed that the blips representing the Skull were nearing Rick’s position. ‘Come on Miriya, go faster’, she willed.

She could see the Invid maneuver to get between Rick and the oncoming Skull squadron, and after several tense moments she cheered to herself when she saw another Invid disappear from the screen.

She brought her hands together in front of her as if she were saying a prayer and said, “Come on, Rick. One more.”

Finally the last Invid vanished off the scope and the Sit. Room erupted in cheers and applause.

Lisa threw her arms around Max’s neck, and he returned her embrace by putting his arms around her waist.

They hugged each other in shared relief until they heard Miriya’s frantic call over the speaker, ‘Rick, watch out!’

Lisa released Max and looked at the screen. There were no other immediate threats and she was at a loss. She looked at Max and he shrugged his shoulders.