fanfic_name = The Sit. Room Incident
chapter = 9
author = Dwparsnip
Rating = AP15
Type = Romance
fanfic = Rick was finally out of the one-size fits all hospital gowns that he had been stuck since they brought him in and into a sweat suit that Lisa had brought from their quarters. It was his favorite gray sweat suit, the one that Lisa gave him years ago for a birthday present. Rick had suspected that both Lisa and Max enjoyed watching him try to get around in that gown, which he never could get to hide everything.
He was watching Lisa now through the doorway, talking to a nurse at the nurse's station. He had noticed that she had tried a couple of times to leave the area, but the nurse always stopped her by saying something else.
He still had a terrible aching feeling in his body that had nothing to do with the physical injury to his cranium. He had to tell her something that was going to hurt her. He knew Max was right when he said that Lisa would understand, but for the few seconds or the few minutes or couple of hours that it would take for her to process what had happened, she would be devastated.
And that would tear a hole in the fabric of his soul.
Despite that though, he knew that he had to tell her as soon as he could. Putting it off would only make it seem as though he were trying to hide it, which would hurt her even more. Lisa deserved to know the truth about what had happened.
He kept watching as his wife talked to the nurse, or more accurately as the nurse talked to her. It did him good to see her in something other than a uniform or nightclothes. She looked absolutely magnificent in her jeans and blouse. The blue denims hugged her curvy thighs and legs in exactly the right places, and the blouse was tantalizingly tight but tasteful.
Allowing himself a moments respite from the worrying that was plaguing him over the task ahead of him, he smiled and thought to himself, 'It's the perfect combination for the perfect woman'.
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Lisa glanced into Rick's room as she talked to the nurse and caught him looking at her with the most wonderful smile on his face. Well, she never really caught him because he never really tried to hide the fact that he was admiring her. She had hoped her choice of outfit would drive him a little insane, the theory being it would help him to feel better in the long run.
'He has barely taken his eyes off me', she thought happily. 'And I don't mind one little bit.'
And she really didn't. There was once a time when she would have given anything for him to look at her like that, back when he didn't seem to know she existed outside of the military, and she promised herself a long time ago that she would never take it for granted when he did look at her admiringly or feel embarrassed by his attention.
She smiled at him and he blew her a kiss. She had to keep herself from chuckling as the nurse was explaining the test that was scheduled for the next week.
She glanced at him again. 'I adore that suit on him', she thought approvingly. 'The gray compliments his eyes.'
He had become steadier over the last couple of hours and he hadn't complained about anything, except the sore lump that adorned his forehead. Lisa knew better than that though. From the years of familiarity, closeness and loving observation she could see that he was still a bit wobbly, and he wasn't totally back to normal mentally either. He was putting on a brave front for the medical staff and she was thrilled that Jean was releasing him. Hopefully.
"I can't wait to go home and just be alone with him."
As his head continued to clear and he became steadier however, he also became a little more loving, but not in the way that he usually did. 'It almost seems as though he's trying to make up for something,' she thought absently. The nurse was going over the procedure for the third time. 'What was it he said, 'I have something to tell you Lisa, something important.' He's been acting strangely ever since he said that.'
"Okay Lisa", said Jean Grant as she walked purposefully up to her. "I...oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt."
"We're finished", said Lisa, quicker than she meant to. She ignored the annoyed look on the nurse's face. "Thank you nurse", she said as she took Jean by the arm and led her into Rick's room.
She closed the door after they entered and she looked at Rick with deep relief.
He grinned and said in a dramatic stage whisper, "Escaped at last!"
Lisa laughed and Jean looked confused.
Lisa moved to stand beside Rick and she looked at Jean. "What do you think Jean?", she asked, hoping she hadn't noticed that she was holding her breath.
Jean came over and took a good look at the sizable lump on Rick's head. When she finished she looked at them both and said, "I think that Rick has a very hard head." She laughed at the irritated look on Rick's face and the knowing smile on Lisa's. "Give me a few minutes to finish the paperwork and you guys can go home." With that she left, and Rick turned to Lisa and gave her a very affectionate hug.
He was holding her as if it were going to be the last time that they would hold each other, and the worry in Lisa's heart grew. She had no idea about what could be bothering him or what it was that he had to tell her, but as the time passed he seemed to get more and moe.'Contrite?', she thought
True to her word three minutes and a few seconds later Jean returned to Rick's room, and after many, many promises by Rick to take it easy for a while, followed by many, many dire warnings about what would happen if he didn't, Jean allowed Rick to go home and enoy the personal care of his loving wife.
Lisa held her arm out for Rick to take, and with a loving smile he did just that. They walked out the door to his former room and began to walk down the hall. Rick stopped and released Lisa, turned around and said to Jean and the nurses present, "Thank you all very much for your care, help and support." He smiled as he said, "I've been in.well, a lot of hospitals over the years, and you ladies are the best." There was laughter from the women and Rick turned to leave when he heard Jean Grant say, "Admiral?"
He looked at her and she came to attention and saluted, and as the nurses realized what Jean had done they too came to attention and saluted.
Lisa was beaming with pride, and Rick was almost overcome with gratitude and pleasant surprise. He took a step towards them, came to attention himself and offered them an exacting salute, being extremely careful not to hit his tender forehead with his fingers. He brought his arm down and nodded. He turned around to see Lisa smiling at him, and he felt a little embarrassed at all of the attention.
"Let's go home", he said.
She held out her right arm and he took it again. She placed her hand over his and as they started walking she said, "Home it is."
The walk to their quarters should have only taken ten minutes, but turned into thirty-five. Everyone that saw Rick asked how he was doing, offered salutes, expressed their thanks that he was okay or just wished him well.
Finally they reached their quarters and Rick turned to Lisa and whispered, "Quick, before someone else sees us." He had been grateful for everyone's comments and concern, but he just wanted to go home to be with his wife.
They went inside and Rick went to the couch and sat down while Lisa shut the door behind them.
As she locked the door she asked him, "Can I get you anything Rick?" When she turned around to get his answer and looked at him, her heart skipped a beat with concern. He was suddenly looking very pale and extremely uncomfortable, his cheerful smile had left to be replaced by a sad looking frown, and his eyes were dark as though they were contemplating a terrible burden.
Lisa was becoming more and more worried. Less than an hour ago they were looking forward to celebrating Rick's release from the infirmary and he was so jovial and well on the road to recovery. Now.
"Rick, what is it?", she asked, afraid of what he was going to say.
He looked up at her. Her heart was racing and she had to tell herself, 'Calm down Lisa.'
He patted the couch next to him to indicate that he wanted her to sit next to him. "Lisa.please sit down."
She began, "Rick."
He looked at her pleadingly, as if to say that what he was going to do was hard enough, please don't make it worse.
Dreadful anticipation grabbed her heart and she slowly walked to the couch and sat next to him. He turned his body to face her she turned her body to face him. They were close, very close, and for the first time since they had gotten home Lisa noticed the very small beads of sweat on his forehead.
She said quietly, "Rick, you're scaring me. What is it?"
When she told him that he was scaring her a look of massive pain washed over his face. He closed his eyes as if to summon the strength to begin an arduous task, and when he opened his eyes and looked at her she saw something in his eyes she had never seen before: fearful resignation.
He took her hands in his and began. "Lisa.I.have something to tell you about the dream I had this morning."
"Rick if all of this is about some dream I'm going to put a bruise on the other side of your head", she said humorously.
He never even cracked a grin. "No Lisa, it's not all of it, but it's part of it."
Rick told her his dream. He told her how she was there with him in that dark cave, and how they had kissed and how much love there was between them.
She was beginning to wonder how this was a bad dream, when that name was spoken by her husband's lips. 'Sue Graham', she repeated to herself in disbelief when he had told her of how one second the person with him was her and the next second it was Graham.
He told her everything, leaving nothing out, just as he had dreamed it. He even told her of the feelings he had experienced in the dream: love, passion and desire.
He stopped and waited for her to say something. He couldn't read the expression on her face and that worried him more than if she had burst out crying or struck out with anger. He couldn't remember the last time he had looked at her and couldn't figure out what or how she was feeling.
She looked at him and her expression turned from unreadable to loving warmth. She smiled and said, "It was just a dream Rick. You had a concussion and you weren't yourself. It didn't mean anything.", her expression changed to one of trepidation, ".unless you're saying that.that you think it was Graham you wanted to be with."
She went to get up and he stopped her by strengthening his grip on her hands. He shook his head adamantly though it hurt like hell, and said intensely, "No Lisa, that's not what I'm saying at all."
He closed his eyes and began, "I got to thinking about the dream, and as I thought about it, it seemed as though some of it was more like.memories than a dream." He opened his eyes and looked at her.
"Memories?", asked Lisa, her voice barely a whisper.
"I talked through it with Max, and I remembered what happened in that cave. Lisa, I.I thought it was you in the cave with me. I remember so clearly that it was you, you're the only person I remember. I saw your face, heard your voice, felt your.", he stopped. She looked shaken and thunderstruck. "I thought it was you, and I kissed you. But it wasn't you. I know now that I kissed Sue in the cave."
He now felt her grip tighten on his hands and he continued before the courage and strength left him.
"We kissed, and we.I started to undo.to undress you." Tears were forming in her green eyes, and despite his best efforts to keep calm and strong his own blue eyes felt obligated to join them. "I wanted to be with you Lisa, so badly. I wanted to hold you, to kiss you and.love you."
Lisa didn't want to hear anymore. She tore from his grip and stood up from the couch, and as she did she was so upset and overwhelmed that she staggered towards the door as if Rick had physically battered her.
"Lisa!", he shouted and got up to stop her from leaving. The pain in his head was excruciating, but he didn't waiver. He caught up to her as she reached for the door and took her hands again as she sank to the floor. She just sat there, tears flowing down her delicate cheeks, shaking her head slowly and whispering, "No, no, no."
He got down on his knees in front of her and brought her head closer to rest against his chest. "Lisa, nothing happened." He understood why she reacted the way she had. She assumed that Rick and Sue had been together intimately.
"Lisa", he went on, "I took off her uniform shirt and passed out. Nothing happened."
She leaned back and looked at him with her emerald eyes, looking to see if he was telling her the truth or what she had wanted to hear. She knew Rick well enough to know that the sincerity in his voice and eyes when he told her that nothing sexual happened was genuine. She could also see that the pain in his eyes was real. Not the physical pain, but the pain that he was feeling from telling her these hurtful things.
"I thought she was you Lisa", he said softly, his eyes looking deeply into hers. "If I had known it was Graham, I never would have done anything. She means nothing to me Lisa and I don't want anything to do with her. It's you Lisa, it always has been and always will be."
He looked at her, his blue eyes pleading with her green ones.
"Please.please tell me you believe that." He was begging and he knew it.
He didn't care.
He was hurting the woman he loved more than anything. He had no pride left in him.
He didn't care about that either.
Lisa's mind was racing over what he had just told her. 'Rick and Sue. Rick?'
She looked at him and pictured him kissing and undressing Sue Graham, and she became physically ill.
"You've got to believe me Lisa. I thought it was you all along. Please.forgive me."
She got up off of the floor and walked across the room, finally supporting herself against the kitchen doorway. He got up and was going to go to her when she held up her hand for him to stop where he was. He did, and she closed her eyes and bowed her head.
Lisa was again running over everything that he had said.
Part of her said, 'He was hurt Lisa. He had a concussion and wasn't in control.' Another part of her agreed, 'No, he wasn't.'
'He thought it was you that he was with, do you believe him?', came a question. She replied to herself, 'Yes.'
'It was you he said he wanted to be with.'
'I believe that, too.'
'He said he doesn't want anything to do with Graham. Do you believe that?'
'Yes, I do.'
'Graham never tried to stop him!', she realized. 'She was going to let it happen. She's to blame for this.'
His final appeal replayed in her mind and she asked herself, 'Do you forgive him?'
'Do I forgive him?'
"No", she whispered aloud, still to herself. She looked up and squared her shoulders to him with a confidence instilled in her by years of practice and training. She had decided, and with that decision came the strength that she so desperately needed to show him right now.
"No," she repeated louder so that he could hear her.
The look on her face had changed over the last few seconds into something he could easily read: pure, unadulterated rage. She spoke for several more seconds, but he was so stunned by her negative response and the anger in her eyes that he didn't even hear it, it just sounded like she was mumbling from a distance. 'No', she had said. He had hoped badly that she would realize what had happened, as Max had suggested she would, and understand that what he had done was not intentional on his part. Before he could shake himself out of his trance he heard the door to their quarters open and close.
"Lisa!", he shouted as he went to the door. He was going to run after her, but he didn't have the chance, as a blinding pain in his head made him collapse as he took the first step out the door.
He fell to his knees, holding himself up with his left hand and holding his forehead with the other. 'What was it Jean said about avoiding stress?', the back of his mind asked.
"Rick!", he heard someone exclaim and part of him recognized the sound as the voice of Max Sterling.
"Lisa", he moaned as he felt Max put his hands on his shoulders, helping him up and then supporting him as they moved inside to the couch. When Rick sat down, Miriya handed him a glass of water. He hadn't even noticed her come in with Max.
Both of them looked at him with grave concern.
"What happened Rick?", asked Max.
The pain was still throbbing in his head so hard that he could barely manage to speak. "Lisa.I told her everything Max. She.she was so.hurt. I asked her to forgive me, and she said no. Then.then she left."
"How long ago?", asked Miriya.
He looked at her through a pain-induced haze and replied, "Just before you got here."
Miriya put her hand on Max's shoulder and left without saying anything.
Rick shakily put the glass on the coffee table and tried to get up and follow Miriya, but he would have collapsed to the floor again if Max hadn't been ready to catch him.
Max held him up and Rick began to weep quietly. He eased Rick back onto the couch and said firmly, "Rick, it's going to be okay. You've got to take it easy or you'll end up in the infirmary where you won't be able to do anyone any good, especially Lisa. Miriya will find her."
"Lisa.", Rick managed before he passed out from the grief and the pain.
Max lid him down and covered him with a blanket he retrieved from the nearby closet.
He looked at Rick on the couch and thought, 'Don't worry Rick. It's going to be okay, I promise you.'
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Lisa walked down the corridors of her ship like a woman possessed with a cause greater than herself. She had gone to the quarters of the woman she was looking for first, and when she wasn't there she went to her office. She wasn't in either place and that just fuelled the anger that was steadily increasing inside of her like an expanding super nova.
She decided to try the Mess next. As she walked she ignored the salutes and greetings of the crew, she was so focused on her search.
She got to the Mess and looked inside through the window of the door and spotted the person for whom she was searching.
Lisa just stood outside the Mess looking at Sue Graham as she talked to Lieutenants Andrea Grace and Angela Marques, laughing and apparently having a good time. She clenched her right fist as she had the moment before she had punched Graham, driving her fingernails into the palm of her hand so hard that it started to bleed.
She never noticed.
'How dare you take advantage of him?', she thought furiously. She continued to let the firestorm of rage in her heart grow and grow. 'I was going to thank you for taking care of him down there. I don't believe it. You've made your last attempt to seduce my husband you.'
Finally her anger had built up sufficiently and she stepped forward to open the door when she felt a strong hand on her shoulder. Enraged that her mission was so cruelly interrupted, she whirled on the person who had stopped her.
"Don't try and stop me Miriya", she growled and turned to go inside the Mess to confront Graham.
"Now is not the time for this my friend", said Miriya calmly, and she reached to take a hold of Lisa's arm.
Lisa ripped her arm out of Miriya's hand and again started to go inside the Mess.
"Lisa.", said Miriya.
She quickly stepped in front of Lisa, blocking her from going inside.
"Miriya, get out of my way", Lisa snarled and pushed her off to the side.
Miriya had had enough of that. In a lightning fast move she grabbed Lisa by her right shoulder and spun her around to face her. When Lisa faced her she grabbed both of her shoulders and pushed her up against the wall, using her powerful athletic arms to pin her there so she would hear what she had to say. Lisa was not a slouch in the art of hand-to-hand combat by any means, but she instantly realized the former Quadrano leader had her over powered and out matched.
"Miriya, let me go!", Lisa barked.
"Now is not the time my friend", she repeated calmly.
"I'm mad as hell Miriya!", she exclaimed angrily. "Now is the perfect time to take care of that little.!"
"Not when Rick needs you", Miriya interrupted, allowing a little coldness of her own into her voice to try to get Lisa to focus on what she was saying.
"Rick is fine in our quarters.", Lisa tried to say.
But the intense shaking of Miriya's head interrupted her. "No Lisa, he isn't fine. He collapsed in the corridor when he tried to run after you and he's asking for you."
"He.what? Collapsed?", said a confused Lisa. The anger in her body was instantly channeled into a sense of fear for her husband's health. "I told him."
She tried to go to him but Miriya, thinking she was still intent on facing Graham, held her tightly in place against the wall. She struggled to get free but Miriya would not budge.
"Miriya please." Realizing why Miriya hadn't let go, she said, "I'll deal with her later. I've got to go to Rick."
Seeing the fear in Lisa's eyes, Miriya let go of her immediately and said in a relieved voice, "Lead the way Lisa."
Lisa ran home to her quarters with Miriya in close pursuit.
She opened the door, took a couple of steps inside and stopped dead in her tracks with a feeling of dread and guilt. He was on the couch covered in a blanket, his cheek was wet and his tears stained the pillow that Max had placed under his head. His lips were moving, forming words but he didn't actually make any sounds.
Max was sitting in a chair next to the couch. She looked at him and asked, "How is he Max?" He stood up and pointed to the kitchen without uttering a syllable. She wanted anxiously to go to Rick, but seeing the way that Max had looked at her, she decided it was better to see what he had to say first.
She followed him into the kitchen and Miriya joined them a moment later.
Annoyed at Lisa for leaving Rick in the state that he was in, Max said hotly, "What happened Lisa? We found him collapsed in the hall. He said you didn't forgive him and left! You can't seriously blame him for any of this."
Lisa was shocked by the angry tone of Max's voice, as well as the hostility in his eyes. "I don't blame him, Max."
"What do you mean you.", and he stopped. "You don't?", he asked.
She smiled and said, "No Max, I don't blame him. I blame Sue Graham." Really confused now she looked back and forth between Max and Miriya and added, "I told him I'd be back."
Max and Miriya looked at each other, more than a little puzzled by the situation.
Lisa looked at them and asked, "What is going on?"
They didn't have an answer, and were saved a moment later when they heard Rick call out Lisa's name in the living room.
Lisa hurried to the couch. A lone tear was falling down his cheek and she felt so terrible for leaving him alone. She knelt down beside him and said softly, "Rick."
"Lisa", he said in a pitiful voice.
She was heart broken. "It's okay Rick, I'm here and I won't leave again. I'm so sorry I left you alone." She gently stroked his left cheek and wiped away the tear that was making its way down to join the others on the pillow.
He opened his eyes and looked at her.
Realizing she really was beside him he reached for her right hand and gripped it tightly.
"Rick, what happened?", she asked. "Why did you come after me?"
"I didn't want you to leave me Lisa."
"Rick", she interrupted, "I told you I'd be back."
"'No' you said. I asked you to forgive me and you said 'no'." He sounded as though his reason for being was gone.
"I did say 'no'", she agreed, but continued by saying, "But then I said that there was nothing to forgive. Didn't you listen?"
With her help, he sat up on the couch without loosening his hold on her hand and gingerly shook his head. "All I can remember is you saying 'no'."
She smiled at him and said tenderly, "Rick, you sweet, adorable fool. I said I wouldn't forgive you because you didn't need forgiveness. I know it wasn't your fault Rick. I told you I was going to see Graham and that I wouldn't be long. You didn't hear any of that?"
He looked terribly embarrassed and said awkwardly, "No. When I heard you say 'no' I just started thinking about.well I just started thinking."
Her shame in her own recklessness became limitless. She should have made sure Rick was okay before storming off to have it out with Graham. She knew he was still unsteady and unwell, and for her to abandon him so suddenly to satisfy her anger was inexcusable.
"I'm so sorry Rick", she said honestly. She kissed him lovingly and sat down next to him on the couch putting her head on his right shoulder.
He was beginning to perk up a little; the short rest and Lisa's return working wonders for his state of mind and his physical health. It was then that he noticed a sticky feeling in the palm of his hand, the one that was holding Lisa's hand. He released her hand and then turned it so he could see her palm.
Concerned he asked, "Lisa, what happened?" In the palm of her right hand were four crescent shaped cuts, each one's size corresponding perfectly to the size of one of her fingernails.
Between her anger at Graham and her worry for Rick, she hadn't even noticed the little cuts that she inflicted on herself when she wrung up her fist at seeing Graham.
"It's nothing Rick, I'll be fine." She changed the subject by asking, "Feeling better?"
He leaned his head against hers and said happily, "Much better, now that you're here with me."
Max and Miriya had stood back and watched all of it unfold without making a sound, so when Max handed Lisa a cloth for her hand and spoke it almost startled Rick and Lisa. "Do you guys need anything before we leave?", he asked.
"No Max", said Lisa as she wiped the crimson from Rick's hand and then her own. She got up, walked them to the door and hugged them both.
Miriya asked quietly, "You're sure there's nothing else we can do?"
Lisa shook her head slowly and said, "No. You've both done more than your fair share tonight. I don't know how to thank the two of you."
"Think nothing of it. Call if you need us", said Max as he opened the door.
"I will", replied Lisa as they left. She closed the door behind them and walked back over to the couch where Rick was still sitting.
She stopped in front of him and said softly to him, "Why don't you come to bed and get some rest?" When she finished speaking she held out her hand to help him up.
He looked at the hand that she was holding out for him to take. He reached up and took it, looking again at her palm. He brought her hand to his lips and softly kissed her small wounds. When he finished, he got up and followed her into their bedroom. He didn't even bother to get changed, he just lid down on his back on their bed
She lid down next to him, watching him intently. "I love you Rick", she said lovingly as she laid her uninjured hand on his chest. "I love you so much."
He reached up and held her hand. "I love you Lisa", he murmured as sleep began to overpower him.
Lisa watched as her husband finally fell asleep thinking not about Sue Graham, the Regis, the SDF-3 or any of the other unimportant things that she routinely worried about, but about the man she loved, sleeping next to her.
State = Continuará/To Be Continue
feedback = Sí/Yes
email = dparsnipAThotmail.com